Academic survival demands far more than the obvious vocational skills of researching, publishing and teaching. In order to succeed (or even hang on in) you are required to ‘be’ as well as ‘do’. By this we mean there is a hidden but potent ontological pressure to embrace particular values about who you are and how you relate to others. Such values emphasise individuality, independence, rationality and merit, and form the cornerstones of the educational establishment. Reflecting and reinforcing the lives and experiences of the dominant and powerful these values invariably underpin academic achievement at both school and university. Those who are successful in exams and become teachers or academics themselves have either been brought up to take these values as given, or must internalise them in order to progress. This chapter explores the social process of academic assimilation, focusing particularly on the practice of social networking in universities.